Book: "The obstacle is the way".
The book begins by explaining the story of John Rockefeller, who was one of the men who managed to accumulate the most money during the nineteenth century. Rockefeller, through his oil company StandarOil Company, managed to be the American with the greatest economic wealth of all times, however, throughout his life he had to overcome many obstacles. He was the son of an alcoholic criminal who abandoned his family and had to face the financial crisis of 1857 originated in Ohio. When he was only 19 years old and began to venture into the world of investments at that time Rockefeller could have taken another career with less risk, but even at his age he had an unflappable calmness in the most difficult moments, he could be calm and look at things with objectivity while everyone else was losing their heads. It was that objectivity that gave him the edge over all his adversaries to take advantage of every obstacle that came his way, such as the crisis of 1873 or 1907 or the great depression of 1929. Rockefeller saw opportunities in every disaster, so much so that 20 years after the crisis of 1857 he dominated 90% of the oil market and for the rest of his life the bigger the crisis the calmer he was; in this way he managed to make his fortune in most of those market fluctuations. Evidently it was a learned behavior from all the crises he had to face in life, but Rockefeller's story is more than an analogy; in less than a decade we have experienced two major economic crises, rising unemployment, high inflation rates, businesses on the verge of bankruptcy and the only reaction we have learned to these kinds of problems is panic, discouragement, anger, despair, but it is up to us to learn to see things differently. We can see problems in a more objective way, we have the ability to choose how to respond to each situation, we can see the disaster rationally and experience many negative emotions or we can see each disaster as an opportunity and transform a negative situation into education and a way to become a better person. In life we are all going to face obstacles, fairly or unfairly, and you will discover over and over again that what matters most is not the obstacles themselves, but how we see them, how we react to them. When one person sees a crisis another person sees an opportunity, when someone is blinded by their success another sees reality with unrelenting perception.
Rubin Carter was a boxer and a leading contender for the middleweight title, he was wrongly convicted of a crime he did not commit, triple homicide. When he arrived at the jail his words to the guards were as follows: "I know you have nothing to do with the injustice that brought me to this jail, I am willing to stay here until I serve my sentence, but under no circumstances will I be treated as a prisoner because I am not." Instead of getting depressed and considering this as an impossible obstacle to overcome, he knew that he had the capacity to choose: he could get depressed, but he also had the option to look for the solution to his problems. He understood that everything has a purpose and therefore he dedicated every moment in that place to learn about law, philosophy, history; he did not ruin his life, he simply understood it as a test. After 19 years he was released from prison and not only was he declared innocent, but he improved as a person in many aspects of his life.
We have the freedom of decision in every situation of our life and in every decision we face they can put us in jail, take away every one of our positions, but they will never control our thoughts, beliefs and reactions. The key is to perceive the obstacles that life puts in our way in a positive way, something that is not easy and requires practice; for this it is necessary to control our emotions.
This book describes how astronauts, before being off the ground, must train one skill more than any other and that is not to panic; if they do, they disregard the processes, do not carry them out correctly and lose their ability to think clearly.Most of us are not astronauts, but we must learn to control our emotions when facing our problems in order to focus all our energies on solving those in front of us. If an emotion cannot change the situation you are facing it is an unhelpful emotion, a destructive emotion. No one says that if you have an obstacle, an unfortunate situation, you can't cry if you feel it, take the time, do it, but then act, don't be paralyzed. Problems are rarely as bad as we think they are and the worst thing that can happen is not the event itself, but the event and losing your head, because now you will have two problems one of them unnecessary. Once we manage to perceive the obstacles and problems as they are it is time to act and it is not just any kind of action that you must do, it is a directed action in search of solutions.
It was through action that Demosthenes, despite being born sick, weak and with speech impediments, managed to become one of the best orators in Athens, a young man who at the age of seven lost his father and was mocked for his way of speaking, would manage years later to mobilize an entire nation through his voice. Many of us in his position would have given up, but Demosthenes did not, on the contrary, he took action to conquer his speech impediment; his action determined the potential he could acquire.
All of us have weaknesses, the important thing is to act in search of improvement and not to stay blocked waiting for something to magically happen, and sometimes we forget something in life: no matter what happens to us or where we come from, what matters is what we do with what happens to us and with what is given to us and the only way you will do something spectacular is using everything you have at your disposal, in your favor; keep in constant action, do not stop, and if you have a project keep doing the actions you have to carry out to bring it to completion.
When a manager is taking his vacation some programmer is looking for ways to destroy the business of that company and while you waste your time the same is happening to you, so have persistence.remember that Thomas Alva Edison was not the only person experimenting with incandescent lights, but he was the only man willing to try 6000 different filaments.sometimes we think that successes like these come in a moment of inspiration, when the reality is different: they are failures that give you the opportunity to learn something different. The goal is to start acting because as we saw it is the best way to overcome all the difficulties we have both in our personal life and in business.
The last important aspect to overcome the obstacles that we face in our life is the will, which is defined as that inner power which cannot be affected by the outside world. We must recognize that there are things we cannot always control. We must prepare ourselves for difficult times, surely if you don't have an obstacle right now, at some point in your life you are going to have to face it. In life there are things that are beyond our reach and we cannot change, surely the fact of being born with certain disadvantages, little money, few opportunities, illnesses, deaths of loved ones; life will always put obstacles in our way and there will always be situations that will demand the best of us.
The book also tells the story of Theodore Roosevelt who, despite being born into a wealthy family, spent the first 12 years of his life fighting a terrible asthma attack that almost cost him his life; However, one day his father came to his room and told him "you have the mind but not the body, I am giving you the tools to strengthen them, it will be difficult but I think you have the determination to do it" to which he replied "I will strengthen my body" and trained his body in the gym that his father had provided him with for five years, making his asthma disappear completely. That character acquired after facing that long battle against his illness gave him the strength to face the many obstacles he would later have to overcome (death of his loved ones, assassination attempts by his opponents, betrayals,...).
And you, are you prepared to face the obstacles that are inherent in life, start building your character, weaknesses do not have to be permanent, we are all born with them. It is clear that many people have accepted these weaknesses and have felt powerless, they have not even tried to overcome them, but those who with determination have taken these obstacles as a possibility to improve have managed to do incredible things.
Be prepared for things not to always go the way you expect them to go, accept the reality that you lost money, for example, isn't losing money a possibility when you bet on a business, lost your job, lost your family, lost your house, lost everything, how would you feel if the fruit of your work was lost?
How would you feel if the fruit of your life's work was consumed in a fire like it happened to Thomas Edison? Disappointment, anger, fury, that was not his reaction... Incredibly, in a very calm manner, he told his son "go and bring your mother and your friends, you will never see a fire like this again". And the next day, once the fire was under control, he went back to his workplace and started working harder to rebuild his empire.
There are things that we cannot control from happening, but for some reason when obstacles appear instead of doing more we do less, instead of looking for opportunities we remain paralyzed. There are many books that teach us how to become successful, but it is also important to have a guide on how to overcome our obstacles, remember that we should not expect anything from life, it is life that is always expecting something from us, remember: the obstacle is the path.
How many times have we seen people that when they are under extreme pressure or have difficulties in life collapse and fall into depression or think they can no longer move forward, feeling frustrated and very bad. The truth is that this happens very often, most of the events are things that we cannot control such as the weather, the conditions, the perceptions of others, among many other things, but if it is not in our hands to control that, wouldn't it be better to accept it and take it with absolute tranquility and enthusiasm? Normally when we are in a difficult situation where our emotions are at their peak, reactive people start to curse their life conditions, to have a limiting internal language, to blame others, to complain and worst of all to give up.
There is something you need to know: all people in this world have gone through difficulties and we will go through many more, whether in our relationships, in our finances, in our society and only people who take every obstacle as an opportunity are the ones who will be able to continue taking their life to the next level. This may sound strange, but you have to love every obstacle, as these are always a very good opportunity to grow, these make you a fitter person.
You will see that most of your obstacles are not in your control, but what is in your control is how you respond to those obstacles and the best way to respond to them is to take them as an opportunity for growth. All this is based on your perception, there is no good or bad here, simply your interpretations; therefore, it can be something that drives you or something that limits you, it all depends on your perceptions. Many people will try to impose theirs on you, but you have to understand that in the same way we all have different perceptions and therefore you have to evaluate the best decision with a better perspective. A trick you can do when you have an obstacle is to think that it is not happening to you, you have to get out of yourself and see yourself as if you were someone else, because when someone tells us their problems we usually see them as something very simple to solve because we are serene and we are not with emotions to the fullest. So every time you are presented with an obstacle act in the best way, learn to control your emotions, to see the best of each obstacle, control your nerves, focus on what is under your control and is in the present time; controlling yourself is the best thing you can do, in any case. A simple example of this mentioned in this book are the astronauts, who have to be very well trained so that when their emotions are at the limit they have the maximum possible control over them and over the situation, in fact, when they were recruited that was a fundamental requirement to get in, to control your emotions, since this will avoid accidents and they will know how to think clearly on how to solve a problem.
Now you have to take action, all the actions you do have to be solution oriented, you don't have to get depressed and stop acting; on the contrary, you have to think about what are the best solutions and act on them, you have to concentrate on the process and not just think about what could have happened, also the actions you take should not be based on your ego. Many people think that the action they are taking is the best, because they say that they already know how to solve everything and that there is nothing to improve, but this is counterproductive because you are closing any possibility of growth and even though you have gone through some similar difficulties there will always be something in which you can improve; that is why you have to focus on always improving and not to appear to be the one who knows everything and does not make mistakes.
Your actions have to be based on persistence, energy, pragmatism, strategic vision and understanding; everything goes together, everything that happens in your head and your perceptions will make you make the best decisions; and finally we have the will, which is an inner power that cannot be affected by the outside world. The book tells us that things will someday go wrong, so we have to prepare ourselves for things not to go exactly as we want and not facing things as they are is fatal for our life because instead of solving the problem you will be focusing on things that you can never control and you will never progress.
Another tip for making good decisions when faced with an obstacle is to think like people who have already gone through something like this or someone who knows very well how to solve problems. Ask yourself if I were such a person, how would I solve this problem, what would be the best decision I would make, when you have an obstacle also think about what skill you lacked to face that obstacle, what you can improve in yourself so that when something similar happens to you again, you can overcome it and it will be easier to solve it.
If you want to know more about our training proposal in aesthetic medicine, we encourage you to contact us. We will solve your doubts and advise you on what you need.
Dr. Manuel Rubio Sanchez
aesthetic doctor
